Wish

What is chewing me now is my own refusal to reality in the past.   His wish was never said probably because of my selfish, stubborn hope that he would get better and come home again  (as he had many times in the past) .

I want to tell people not to end up like me, not to avoid talking about death, especially when it comes into perspective.  The sick one is far more dauntless and noble about it than you are.  

When I'm gone, please burn my body (and leave my soul alone), my thanks and apology in advance, to whoever has to take care of the mess of my life.

            --phew, that was heavy.